Just a brief playlet/satirical sketch before hundreds more song lyrics and poems by yours truly:
BEYOND THE NORM
(Scene: a doctor with patient on the analyst's couch)
Patient: Tell me doctor. Am I a lunatic?
Analyst: Well I do charge lunatic prices.
Patient: Is that a confirmation?
Analyst: No. It's simply a matter of fact.
Patient: My problem seems to be I can't tell fact from fiction.
Analyst: Believe me. It's true.
As to your problem that's for me to say, not you. You are the patient. I am the analyst.
Patient: You are so perceptive. I see why people recommend you.
Analyst: Ha!! A seer. A visionary. Now we're getting to the root of your problem.
Patient: Already? Gee, you are good.
Analyst: That's why my prices are beyond the norm. Abnormal folk must pay abnormal fees.
Patient: You're a phiosopher as well as a quack I see.
Analyst: Your visions are precise. But I will help you overcome such an illness. The world can well do without visionaries, poets and people who appear to have ventured from far-away planets.
Patient: I'm comforted by your reassurance. Will it hurt?
Analyst: Only your pocket.
Patient: When will the cure begin?
Analyst: It has already begun.
Patient: It has?
Analyst: Yes.
Patient: How so?
Analyst: It began when you informed me you were a seer.
Patient: I thought you informed me?
Analyst: I merely pointed to what you already knew deep inside. By coming to terms with your illness you are on the road to recovery.
Patient: My uncle came to terms with his illness. He died from cancer the very next day.
Analyst: Your illness is a mental illness.
Patient: It's true then? I'm mad.
Analyst: I told you before, that's for me to say.
Patient: Well am I ?
Analyst: Yes.
Patient: Oh no!! What will the neighbours say.
Analyst: I suspect they know but are too polite or frightened to say so.
Patient: How long will the cure take?
Analyst: That depends on your bank balance.
Patient: I'm a wealthy man.
Analyst: But not a healthy man. These things take time... and money.
Patient: Don't worry abot my payments doctor. Money isn't everything.
Analyst: Spoken like a true madman. (offers hand) Here, shake.
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